IJHATT Episode #28 I Love a Parade

I think the officer exploding my daughter’s brain was a bit excessive.

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41 Responses to “IJHATT Episode #28 I Love a Parade”

  1. austin says:

    first to post… WOO HOO!!!

    half way through… but i need to get to bed… so… Fuck Parades, Funerals, & Being A Dumb 14 year old cunt with epilepsy (and an exploded head).

  2. aleene says:

    Ok for the terminator thing, skynet was a military operation, and it basically just took over the base that it was created in once it became self aware, that’s why it’s all built for humans. Why they didn’t tear it down and re-make it I don’t know, maybe it was too much effort.

    And holy shit stop talking about circumcision it’s probably the most boring thing ever.

  3. Allie says:

    I always thought the point of the charity run/walk/whatever is more to do with raising awareness. You see a bunch of people running along with Cancer Research Trust t-shirts on, you know they’re running for charity and that might prompt you in to thinking “Yeah, I’d like to give some money to them”. Or maybe they’re from a lesser-known organisation, and you think “Hmm, I wonder who they are and why they’re doing that” and go look them up. Unless you’ve got a sick relative or friend, stuff like cancer or Alzheimers or whatever might not be at the forefront of your mind, so donating to charity isn’t something you’d necessarily think to do. But it’s stuff like the events and adverts that remind you. I don’t like feeling guilted in to giving money either, but I do like stuff like running the London Marathon to raise money for a particular organisation, because then you’re doing something visible and bringing the charity a bit of publicity. I’ve got no problem with people that don’t want to get involved with those things and would rather just send the money though. I’ve never done a charity run or anything like that, but I’ve definitely been influenced to donate from seeing other people do it.

  4. aleene says:

    Oh for the charity thing, my dad is cycling from london to paris (yeah through the sea) in september sometime. I think the reason people do something for it, is so then it’s easier to say ‘oh yeah I’m doing this’ than going ‘omg gimme muney now’

    Ps; sponsor at http://www.original.justgiving.com/michaelvennard

  5. John K says:

    That John above isn’t real John! Don’t worry.

  6. Jeff says:

    I revisted the older episodes and realized you did cover swearing quite well it had been a bit since hearing it and I forgot. my apologies for rehashing a topic that was already covered.

    also Ding dong, ding dong ditch was referencing being naked while ding dong ditching, ding dong as in dick, supposed to be a joke, not a very good one, again my sincere apologies.

    and finaly I agree with aleene the circumcision shit needs to end, austin I love you but accept defeat.

  7. Jeff says:

    Dear John and Orion just read previous episodes comments I frequently watch sample clips I just always thought that paying for porn meant you got much better porn I now realize that is not the case and also found the sites mentioned in this episode thank you for adressing my pornographic ignorance before I wasted any money

    also Orion, Kyle, and other lovers of cinema should see inglourious basterds right away. I saw it last night and it was the best movie I’ve seen in a long time. if I do say so myself it’s about damn time someone made a movie ’bout scalpin’ Nazis

  8. Marlykins says:

    Hey guys! Good show again. I am on the bandwagon of “Please Stop Discussing Circumcision HOLY SHIT”, but hey, it’s your show in the end, talk about whatever you wanna talk about!

    And thanks for playing along with the Would You Rather game. Dumb questions, yes, I know, but this was a last-minute voicemail; I will be more prepared next time I call in with a fun (yet retarded) little game.

  9. Aleene says:

    but hey, it’s your show in the end, talk about whatever you wanna talk about!

    except circumcision, RIGHT MARLYKINS?!?!?!

  10. Jeff says:

    Aleene, Would you rather be raped in the ass by a large black man named Tank or Listen to another episode about circumcision? Take your time answering. This one is tricky I know.

  11. Aleene says:

    Raped in the ass by tank.

    and you make me choke on cookies, it hurts

  12. Marlykins says:

    I believe Aleene and I should start an Anti-”IJHATT Discussing Circumcision Ever Again” campaign. =D

  13. austin says:

    1st, i call in and you both no my voice, so make fun of it, and not the ignorant racist that thinks the brown people are out to get their jobs.

    2nd, why does my poor english and grammar (or anybody else’s) need to be pointed out? if you read it and can figure it out, then say it that way. i see that on a lot of podcast and i am alway irritated by it. at least i try to make my ramblings appear to be in english.

    3rd, i am circumcised, i am just really against it since the baby doesn’t have a choice, and i understand not want to be sensitive to the feelings from sex so you dont burst, but im conflicted on that one.

    4th, i too am also not wanting to talk about circumcision.

    5th, i dont like forum arguments for the very reason of what has happened over the past 3 shows, the lack of me and you two being able to talk about something when it comes up and being able to clarify my self. i am really bad at making what im thinking come out sounding the same… this way if we were arguing about something, i could clarify something that made sense to me, but didn’t come out right because i left something out that makes sense to me.

    6th, i dont want to die… because the thought of not existing scares the shit out of me, so much that i have problems sleeping, could you maybe talk about this on the show, because i would like to know how you feel other than how you said before, that it wont matter cause you wont exist… or do you even think about it like i do… this is why i will play video games, so i can see something that i would never see or live through… i need to see a shrink.

    i am a little special, but i can only express my thoughts with this simple form of communication. i didn’t read over this, so it may be retarded as shit, but i dont normally think when acting, and that is why people either hate me or really like how weird i can be.

    7th, Bacon Is Fun!

  14. austin says:

    my last post sounds retarded now that is out there… so let me be the first to point this out.

  15. Jeff says:

    Marlykins I would love to join your campaign and aleen those cookies wont hurt as much as Tank

  16. Jeff says:

    and I know I spelled your name wrong, my bad

  17. Kyle says:

    John K: That other John was a spammer, so I removed his comment. Now you look crazy!

    P.S. Next episode will be all about circumcision and atheism. And how much I love Rue McLanahan.

  18. Marlykins says:

    You guys know I’d tune in to your podcast no matter what. Well, so long as it was still the great dudes of IJHATT talking. But whatever! You know what I mean.

    But hoo-rah to the Anti-IJHATT-Discussing-Circumcision-Ever-Again train that seems to be picking up steam! Haha.

  19. John K says:

    I thought fake John might be a spammer, as his comment made no discernible sense.

    Is the device for circumcision called a pair of circumscissors? If not, why not?

  20. P. Shoe says:

    In regards to the kid that was upset that his mom gets offended by swear words, a point I think you guys may have over-looked…

    Look, we all know they’re just words, they don’t mean anything, they’re not a big deal, blah blah blah.

    But you’re 17 and live in your mom’s house. It’s only respectful that, if she finds the words offensive and doesn’t want them said in her home, then just don’t. Once you get out and get your own place, swear away! But when you live in a home someone else pays for, ESPECIALLY if it’s your MOM, be respectful and follow her wishes.

    Do that, and you’ll be more inspired to get out and hang with your friends somewhere else where you can swear. See? Being respectful to your mom will help inspire you to be more social! It’s very much win-win.

  21. austin says:

    yesterday my wife was at the deli in walmart waiting in line, and behind her was a fat ass 8 or 9 year old sitting in a shopping cart… the kid smacks her ass. my wife turns around to see the fat fuck in the shopping cart, his mom apologizes and tells him not to do that again, the kid starts whining, so she hands him a cupcake from the bakery to shut him up… What the Fuck is wrong with this picture, and why was this woman allowed to breed?

  22. austin says:

    i understand why the kid slapped her ass, but im not sure why my wife didn’t slap the fat fuck in the face, i could give two shits if the kid is 9, if it was a 3 year old, then what ever, really young kids arent aware of that much when it comes to sexual shit, but i was from the age of 6… so from that age on, slap the little fucks, or at least the parent.

  23. Jeff says:

    P. Shoe I understand what you’re saying about swearing in front of my mom and I do try to respect her wishes. It’s not like I’m a total prick of a son, in fact compared to most of the brats my age I’m a damn good son, but sometimes in certain situations I do swear. They Just slip out naturally so I get shit about it which inevidebly launches the debate about swearing. The purpose of these debates is simply to try to get her to be less closed-minded about the topic. My goal is not to get her on my side so I can swear all I want it’s for her benifit to try to get her to question it for herself so she can feel free to do what she wants unless she has her own reasons why she thinks it’s wrong not because society says so. she currently believes it’s wrong because she has been conditioned to believe so. She has no logic of her own behind it.

    For the record I’m not one of those douche kids whose just tryin’ to complain about how terrible his parent’s are to whoever will listen. For the most part my parent’s are/were (dad died 8 years ago) Excellent.

    In regards to being inspired to be more social, I don’t know if I sent off the vibe that I’m a total outcast loser, but that’s not the case. I’m generally very social, in fact the only time I’m online is to listen to/comment on this podcast or to look up porn. The rest of the time I’m usually out doing something. I don’t even have a myspace or facebook simply because I see no point in it almost all of my friends live 15 minutes away if I want to talk to them i’ll just go hang out with them. Who knows maybe you’re right and the reason I’m so social is so I can swear more. I never thought so but maybe subconciesly it is.

  24. P. Shoe says:

    Fair enough Jeff. But as a guy who had a lot of “debates” with him mom, and grew up with Orion and Kyle, let me assure you, saying “Well Orion and Kyle are doing it!” won’t work. ;)

    But you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, as they say (no offense to your or anyone else’ mother). If that’s how she’s “conditioned”, then any argument otherwise is just going to be trumped said conditioning. And ever consider the possibility she’s NOT brainwashed, and just honestly finds those words disrespectful and immature? That can just be a personality thing. My mom was a sex-ed teacher, and my dad is an animal biologist. I grew up seeing alllll forms of organs and other “innards”. But it’s just part of my personality to find blood and guts horribly gross. People, ESPECIALLY my parents, tell me all the time “Nah, it’s not so bad” and can go on and on with very logical arguments about it all being natural and basic stuff, and I don’t disagree. But it doesn’t change the fact that I HAAATE seeing that stuff. (I know it’s a sorta different case, but same idea)

    Oh, and sorry, I didn’t mean to make it seem I was calling you unsocial or inferring you were an outcast. Was just trying to make light of the ‘ol “teenager vs. mom” scenario. No offense intended.

  25. Marlykins says:

    John K: I don’t know if they’re called circumscissors or not, but if they aren’t, they should be called that. Wanna start a petition? I’ll sign if you do!

    That ALMOST makes the topic of circumcision worth talking about. But not really; only the ‘circumscissors’ aspect of it is entertaining.

  26. John K says:

    I’m with you on the petition, Marlycake. Perhaps we can form a group on Facebook in favor of the renaming.

    Maybe we can have circumscissors walks for charity.

  27. Jeff says:

    P. Shoe: Perhaps you’re right and it is a personality thing and you can’t teach an old dog new tricks (No offense taken by the way) but since my last post I have sworn in front of my mom and she got pissed and I just dropped it. I figure it’s not worth it so I guess I’m learning through experience.

    I was afraid that after my last post this might launch into a forum debate between you and I and I’d have to stop commenting on this site. I’m glad that wasn’t the case and we could discuss this in a civilized manner. Good talk P. Shoe, good talk.

  28. Jeff says:

    Also Marlykins and John K. I will gladly walk for circumscissors

  29. P. Shoe says:

    Good talk, indeed, good sir!

  30. austin says:

    are you for or against circumcising pterodactyl?

  31. pterodactyl says:

    We have a cloaca that functions for urine, feces, and reproduction. Pterodactyl boning is called the cloacal kiss. Not much there to remove.

  32. Aleene says:

    I don’t believe this is a Pterodactyl for 2 reasons.

    1, The “P” in Pterodactyl is not capitalised
    2, Pterodactyls can’t type.

  33. Jeff says:

    3. if pterodactyls could type it would be something like crraaaaaaw crrrooooo creeeaaaaawww or something like that I’m just guessing, I don’t speak pterodactyleese but I did watch jurasisc park and the land before time alot as a kid

  34. Allie says:

    Maybe someone is typing on behalf of the pterodactyl?

    That raises the question: when they arrive, will new pterodactyl-friendly technologies develop? Like pterodactyl-phones and keyboards and things?

  35. Marlykins says:

    Perhaps the pterodactyl has pterodactyl-voice-recognition software!

    Also, I like this “walk for circumscissors” idea; but what if I’d rather, idk, play video games for circumscissors? Or sleep for circumscissors? Walking for a cause is an unoriginal idea; let’s start something new for this great cause!

  36. pterodactyl says:

    I am an ambassador from the pterodactyl nation. You could not comprehend my name as it is spoken by my people. I have a secretary that I dictate to. Secretarys that speak pteradactylese are expensive and pterodactyls don’t make a lot of money, so forgive me for getting the cheapest pterodactyl interpreting secretary around.

  37. Jeff says:

    Sleeping for circumscissors, BRILLIANT!!!!! Marlykins you are a true visionary and an inspiration to us all.

    And fuck this pterodactyl ambassador. I don’t trust him as far as I could fly him

  38. John K says:

    If someone’ll donate money to circumscissors while I sleep for charity, that is what I’ll do. How about eating pizza for circumscissors, too? I’m always up for charity and pizza-eating.

  39. Aleene says:

    “You could not comprehend my name as it is spoken by my people.”

    Bullshit I have a degree in Pterodactyleese, and it’s spoken in a totally different sentence structure, something these secretary women could not understand. And don’t say “oh they’re men” because there’s no such thing!

    Ps; Pterodactyls don’t actually exist yet.

  40. Kaelin says:

    Hard to stop listening! I have to be at work in ten minutes! Fuck!

  41. Ro says:

    I realize this happened 6 months ago, but I was on the street when the soldier was brought back home. As friends of the family, we were there to support them. His name was Nicky Roush. He was 22 years old. From what I recall, the street was closed to traffic for about 5 minutes.

    As an agnostic, I don’t go to funerals for the person who died, I go to support the family. My mom died when I was 15, so that might have made me more sympathetic in these situations, even though I don’t believe in god.

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